MAD AT MENOPAUSE

Just thinking about the title is bringing on a hot flash.  I am mad at menopause and although I am excited about being in the 50 club, I am not enjoying the hormonal changes that my body is experiencing right now.    I will be talking very candidly about my experience with hormone changes and my body in this blog, and this is not meant to offend anyone, but this is a subject that many are afraid to discuss out of embarrassment, fear, and the belief that these things are to be the “kept secret” of women.  I say bullshit to that.  Health involves discussing all things as it relates to the human body and aging, and I for one am all about sharing, learning, and getting feedback from others on the subject.



LIFE SAVER
I have been frantically researching hormone imbalance for a few years now, have tried supplementation, herbals, transdermal creams, and natural moisturizers at an attempt to restore balance in my body.  I am very aware of the foods that help with hormone balance and eat my share of raw pumpkin seeds and watermelon.  Being a trainer and walking the talk of my profession and passion, I exercise consistently which is another way to help with the stresses of hormone imbalance.  Some women may sail right through without a hitch in the get along, but not this girl, and through my research I have discovered I am not alone in a big way with those that are suffering. 

I began experiencing night sweats years ago, which I easily managed with a transdermal OTC progesterone cream, and that seemed to be the biggest drag of my premenopausal time.  However and for a few years now, my periods began to dictate when they would come, or not, and if I would need super plus everything or not.  I do not know from one month to the next if I am in full menopause.   According to my doctor, I am required to not have a cycle for one full year.  Also, I enjoy my gynecologist and have to say she is easy to talk to, and I respect her opinion and am able to share my desire to go through this process as natural as possible.  The thing about most western medicine doctors is non-support of bio-identical hormones, and they are generally not covered by insurance.  So be prepared for such roadblocks, but also do not be afraid to be yourself and cover every concern with your doctor.

Menopause has been a thief of my womanhood, has plagued me with sleepless nights, is cooking me from the inside out, caused frequent UTIs, and the worst part … a broken “ya-ya”.  This may sound funny, but I am at the point of frustration and working very hard at making the best decisions for me and my body.  I am sure that many can relate to what I am sharing and I am hoping for lots of comments so that we can all support and share what has worked or not worked.  This can no longer be a hide behind the door subject, but as women, it is important to be brave, embrace who we are, what we are going through, and create a voice for answers.  I will get off my soap box now and dive right into my journey of being mad at menopause.



The dreaded hot flash comes at all hours of the day and night, and for some reason, I am bothered most at night.  It is so frustrating to not get a full night sleep and that alone can really put me on edge.  I have discovered that I am best under a light sheet with one leg covered and one leg exposed.  I also sleep with the ceiling fan going which seems to help.  Lord help me if I have a glass of wine in the evening as that will trigger a hot flash before I finish the glass and will definitely haunt me during sleep time, so the key is to stay away from the triggers. What has helped, and with my doctor’s recommendation, with many of my symptoms is Maca Root powder, an herbal that I mix in my green shake each day.  Before taking the product, I put in the necessary research of pros and cons, and decided to give it a go.  What I am sharing has worked and not worked for me, and it is important for each of us to be our own health care advocates and not jump into the “try this” without putting in the research time.  Do not take my word as gospel, as my body is different than yours, and what I share is helpful and informative, and hopefully a motivation to start your own journey of research.  


Moving on to other mad at menopause symptoms: decreased sexual sensitivity, increased bladder discomfort and UTIs, and the dreaded “dry vagina” or what I like to call the broken ya-ya.  Talk about the worst of the worst and are you kidding me??  This has got to be the most unfair situation ever as sex is a very important part of a healthy marital relationship, and we as women need to feel confident about our bodies, our abilities, and not feel guarded about the act because our minds get so focused on things like:   “will I orgasm, am I too dry, will it hurt too much, it is too much trouble … and the list can go on and on”.  Personally, I refuse to be a woman on the edge with the inability to get over the fence and I am referring to orgasm here.  I enjoy this part of my life in a very positive way so research focused in this area has been very thorough.  I have discovered a new vaginal suppository with a coconut oil and vitamin E makeup that works better than most of the OTC products out there.  I use ½ a suppository daily and that keeps me naturally moisturized for the day and into the evening.  My goal is to prevent vaginal atrophy and yes this is what occurs during menopause and in laymen terms, we women start drying up like a prune with a sandpaper interior that clearly states “do not enter or else”.  I refuse to allow any such nonsense to happen, and am fighting for my sexual right as a woman and wife.

Decreased sensitivity during sex can also occur as the body no longer carries the blood supply to the vaginal tissue and clitoris.  Research sent me to L-arginine supplementation which is an amino acid naturally occurring in our body, and studies have shown help with blood supply and flow to the sex organs.  Well, this turned out to be a huge waist of my time, and contributed to cold sores which I can be prone and my research lead me to discover that although it may assist with increased blood supply, L-arginine use also stimulates the virus causing cold sores and so that really ticked me off.  I tossed that out and refused to walk around with a mouth full of hurt in order to supply my other lips. Thank goodness I also keep a supply of Lysine, an immunity boosting amino acid which works to prevent cold sores and I increased the dose to counter act the negative side effects of the L-arginine.  L-arginine will not be a part of my program. 



Another unfortunate menopause related problem that occurs with me has been severe bouts of UTI (urinary tract infection) type symptoms that will wake me in the middle of the night, send me to the floor, and in a fetal position.  I have a low-dose antibiotic on standby when these events occur, OTC Cystex, and cranberry supplements.  I found that a heating pad also helps along with OTC pain reliever like Aleve.  Also, I begin a protocol of increased water and additional 100% cranberry juice to flush out my system.  I am very in tune to my body and can feel when this starts coming on so many of the times I do catch it early and am able to not lose too much time or days off work.  The night may suck getting the symptoms calmed down, but once manageable, I can function pretty well at work and in general. 

I have also looked into HRT (hormone replacement therapy), and currently researching bio-identicals which is still HRT, but with hormone closely related to our own body production.  I have decided I will not take any systemic estrogen by mouth because I do not want the hormone to metabolize through my liver and into my bloodstream.  The incidence of cancer is greater with such therapy so this door is forever closed for me.  I am trying a vaginal insert pill of very low dose estrogen which is localized to the vaginal tissues and in an effort to plump up and restore natural vaginal lubrication and reduction of UTI issues.  I even had doubts and fears regarding cancer with the vaginal insert, but after discussion with natural doctors, and those doctors prescribing bio-identical hormone, their first course of treatment is this very thing: vaginal cream, pill, or ring.  My online research also reduced my fears, and I am willing to give it a go for a few months and am hoping for a positive outcome.  I will need to report back with my personal findings.  I do welcome feedback from women, or husbands whose wives are currently using vaginal insert low estrogen and how it has been helpful or not. 



I have had many discussions with women going through the same issues from menopause and that alone is a help that I am not alone.  It can feel like such a desperate and frustrating time not knowing the best course of action to take, and most important not to subject ourselves to cancer or other disease in the process of discovery.  It feels unfair that very little research and clinical studies into women’s dysfunction caused by menopause have not been completed so that we may have more options, and feel more confident in our decision making.  If anything, I hope my personal share on the subject has been helpful, and provides a comfort that you are not alone in your frustration.  Keep up the research and find what works best for you and your body.  We are all on this journey of life and the transitions along the way and all we can do is our best.  Take good care and Stay Healthy!

I dedicate this Blog to my fabulous husband who is always supportive and understanding.  Thanks Don for your patience, and always knowing the right words to say at just the right times.  I love you forever and a day!














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Stay Healthy!

Darla

UNTIL WE MEET AGAIN

This is such a difficult write and I have been away from my blog for several weeks spending time with my family, and my beautiful Mother-in-law who passed away June 18.  She was my second Mom, I loved her dearly and I still struggle with the realism that she is no longer here physically.  I miss her…












The journey of life holds such beauty and pain, and it is in the experience of death, and being present during that last breathe of a loved one that truly brings into full light the appreciation of the gift of our life and how we spend every moment.  My Mom-in-law is in heaven now, able to breathe, walk, laugh and exist in the perfect form of her spirit in the presence of God and those who have passed before her that she so loved.  At the same time, I struggle with my human feelings of this “is all not real and weird.”  I expect to go over to my in-laws’ and see her, looking forward to one of our many girl talks.  I can still see her and hear her in my mind, and the sound of her laugh will remain forever in my memory. 

The loss of a parent hits very hard to the core of our being, and as I watch my adoring husband process his feelings of saying goodbye to his Mom, my heart aches for him.  We are a close knit, loving family who supports each other through the good and the bad times of life.  This is such a bitter sweet time for him and our entire family.  There are tears and so many stories, and through those we also laugh and capture the very essence of Mom still with us.  I understand that it comes down to time, and healing of one of the greatest losses in this life and it will never be about acceptance.  How can it be?  I would say it will be about change, and learning to live with the loss of such a special woman in our life … Wife, mother, grandmother, great-grandmother, sister, and daughter. 



I understand how one generation carries into the next, and going through this journey of losing my second Mom makes me think about my own mortality.  I am fifty now and even though my health is good, there is still no guarantee of life tomorrow.  Age and even illness are not always the deciding factor of death, which in this write I hope to bring home loud and clear that everyone please appreciate life, your body, family, friends, and all things that are cherished.  It will not be money that will carry you through emotionally difficult times, or even having the fittest body around.  I will say that being emotionally healthy is helping me go through this process and I am thankful my healthy state of well-being keeps me balanced through difficult times, and not running to numb up with medications.  We are made to go through the feelings of joy and sorrow and that is part of life, and we need to be healthy to experience both sides of our journey. 

One last Christmas Time together Dec 2013


My Beautiful Parents-In-Law, Rhoda and Dick Leal married 55 Years


I dedicate this Blog in loving memory of Rhoda Leal, my beautiful second Mom and friend.  I love you always and until we meet again, I will carry your laughter and wisdom in my heart and mind forever. 

One of our last beautiful moments together ... Jammie Party


Thanks for stopping by my Blog, hope you enjoy the content, and if you have not become a follower yet, I would love to see your face on my friend's list.  If you are inspired, LIKE my entry, leave a comment and I look forward to responding!

Stay Healthy!

Darla

DITCH THE BITCH

Life is hard and challenges are put in our path almost daily.  It is those life events that occur over several days, months, or even years that can zap the crap out of us.  I realize that it can be difficult to remain positive or refrain from “bitching” for lack of a better word about the circumstances of life that can bring us down.  I have journeyed through the ups and downs of what has felt like huge ocean waves and have been brought to my knees on several occasions, and yes, I am guilty of a bitch or two or more. It can feel frustrating, hurtful, painful, and unfair when we are tossed into the sea of confused human emotion and circumstances.



What I will share is that “bitching” about it will not change a thing, and in fact, usually makes life feel worse as negative emotions try to take over our very being.  This is when we tend to lash out, make poor choices, and even grab for those comfort foods that are supposed to fix everything when life feels bigger than us.  Life does not come with an “easy” button, but our successes in life are achieved through how well we weather the storms that slap up us in the face and knock us on our butts. 

It is one thing to be physically strong, but I will share that mental strength is what will carry us through life.  Life is “10 percent what happens to us and 90 percent how we respond to it” so if we are bitching about the circumstances and wearing that “why me?” attitude, that eliminates all possibilities to learn and grow from the situation.   “Why or poor” me creates a life of bitterness and resentment, and can scar deep and for many years.  Looking at a situation and saying “I do not like this, BUT what can I learn from this to become a better person” will bless our lives in so many ways.  We will never be able to see the end game and that is where faith comes into the picture.  We can help with the outcome through our attitude however.  If we “Ditch the Bitch” and take on a mental game of “I CAN get through this” no matter what, then you have won already. 



This applies to all areas of life including getting healthy, weight loss, illness, overcoming injury, job loss, and broken relationships just to name a few.  We are all here living a life that we think should happen for us, but we truly do not have control of so many things in this life.  Realizing that we can only control our responses to the uncontrollable is what creates a better self, a healthier and stronger person overall.   Keep in mind that when we are living this journey of life and reaching for goals, it is not in the bitching that the positive stuff happens.  Time to “Ditch the Bitch” and Stay Healthy!



Thanks for stopping by my Blog, hope you enjoy the content, and if you have not become a follower yet, I would love to see your face on my friend's list.  If you are inspired, LIKE my entry, leave a comment and I look forward to responding!



Darla